BREAKING NEWS: National Debt is actually a surplus


It was reported recently that the National Debt Clock was running out of digits and could no longer accurately reflect the nation’s skyrocketing debt. It has just been learned, however, that the digit that had failed to work correctly preceded the debt figure. The National Debt is actually in the negative, meaning that we have a surplus!

News agencies are having a field day with the new information. Reactions around the world are of shock and astonishment. “I can’t believe it! The debt looming over everyone’s heads doesn’t actually exist!” said Ubeen Fuuled, a public works manager in Russia. 

People are celebrating in the streets. Not even the damp weather of the first of April can hurt the collective spirit today.

What I want to know is what you’re going to do with you’re share of the $78,048. I’m going to Disney World.


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